For somebody who loves politics as a lot as I do, it may be humbling to acknowledge simply how unhealthy I’d be at precise politicking. Then once more, it’s truthful to ask why anybody would need to be good at it. All that mendacity, glad-handing, and soul-corroding compromise has to take a toll ultimately, and but there’s an almost infinite provide of spurious pores and skin luggage who need to seize that mantle with a purpose to affect our nice and enduring (for now) American experiment.
And, to be clear, I’m not one among them—and by no means could possibly be. As a lot as I’d wish to make a Jobsian dent in the universe, I merely don’t have the expertise for such issues. On my greatest days, I’ve all of the social grace of a saltine a drunk raccoon disregarded within the rain in a single day. I put the “lose” in “recluse” (which is a singular accomplishment, because it isn’t really there). I’m basically Howard Hughes with a tiny fraction of the cash and a touch much less tiny fraction of the urine jars.
So it’s significantly galling once I see individuals who do have these abilities use them within the furtherance of evil. No, I’m not speaking about Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis, who’s showing on “Fox Information Sunday” along with his spouse, Casey, this week regardless of having the character of a factory-irregular testosterone suppository.
I imply these different Republicans who clearly possess the reward of grab gab however insist on utilizing it to consolation the snug and afflict the bothered. Say what you need about Florida Rep. Matt Gaetz—and there’s a lot to say about him—however the man may really be charming if he ever bothered to take away the Devil chip from his motherboard. And Kristen Welker, a gifted broadcaster who ushered in her “Meet the Press” tenure final month by grabbing the USA by the Underoos and twisting like a New England saltwater taffy machine, may possibly cease watching with Marlin Perkins-like detachment because the antelopes (i.e., all of us) get their faces eaten off by hyenas. In any case, we’re at fascism’s doorstep. It’s okay for a information broadcast to guide with the climate when a Cat 5 hurricane stuffed with snakes and spent heroin needles is bearing down on the coast.
As one among Spider-Man’s kinfolk (it was both Uncle Ben or the radioactive spider) as soon as stated, “With nice energy comes nice duty.”
All you erstwhile homecoming kings and queens have a fantastic expertise. You’re popular, and that’s a bankable commodity. Please don’t waste it on awkward fumblings within the backs of sedans with guys like Biff Tannen.
Okay, hoppin’ off the soapbox now—and proper again into the mud.
Let’s roll, fellow nerds! (You cool youngsters are warmly invited, too. You’re at a Democratic web site, so I do know you’re utilizing your powers for good.)
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1.
We’ll get again to the villains in a bit, however first, Democrats really need to make authorities work for the individuals as an alternative of shrinking it to the scale of a gerbil and drowning it in Donald Trump’s bathtub. (Ugh, are you able to think about what Trump’s bathtub really appears like?)
Congressman and future speaker Hakeem Jeffries joined Dana Bash on CNN’s “State of the Union” to suggest a manner out of the rolling catastrophe that’s the Republican-led Home of Representatives.
BASH: “Former Congresswoman Liz Cheney stated, quote, ‘If the Republicans resolve that Jim Jordan needs to be speaker of the Home, there would not be any doable strategy to argue that elected Republicans could possibly be counted on to defend the Structure.’ Do you suppose Jim Jordan is match to be speaker?”
JEFFRIES: “Properly, it’s not my job at this second to weigh in to the politics which have taken place within the Home Republican Convention, apart from to clarify that it’s time for the GOP to finish the Republican civil battle to ensure that us to have the ability to come collectively in an enlightened and bipartisan strategy to get issues carried out for on a regular basis People.”
Okay, that’s not probably the most dynamic reply. So let’s carry a number of paragraphs from Jeffries’ latest Washington Post opinion piece, which argues for a sane and productive path ahead.
Home Republicans have lashed out at historic public servants and tried to shift blame for the failed Republican technique of appeasement. However what in the event that they pursued a distinct path and confronted the extremism that has unfold unchecked on the Republican aspect of the aisle? When that step has been taken in good religion, we are able to proceed collectively to reform the principles of the Home in a fashion that allows us to control in a practical style.
[…]
The necessity to change course is pressing. Congress is within the midst of a Republican civil battle that undermines our capability to make life extra inexpensive for American taxpayers, to maintain communities secure and to strengthen democracy. Conventional Republicans want to interrupt with the MAGA extremism that has poisoned the Home of Representatives for the reason that violent rebellion on Jan. 6, 2021, and its aftermath — when the overwhelming majority of Home Republicans continued to advertise the “large lie” and voted to not certify the presidential election.
Home Democrats stay dedicated to a bipartisan path ahead, as we’ve got repeatedly demonstrated all through this Congress by offering a majority of the votes to stop a authorities shutdown this month and keep away from a catastrophic default on America’s debt in June.
Looks as if an affordable ask. “Say, let’s reform Home guidelines so Matt Gaetz can’t screw our nation again and again with out even Venmo’ing it first.” And all Jeffries wants is “Republican companions keen to interrupt with MAGA extremism, reform the extremely partisan Home guidelines that had been adopted initially of this Congress and be a part of us find frequent floor for the individuals.”
He simply must discover a handful of affordable Republicans! Shouldn’t be onerous, proper? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Proper? *Wipes away tear* Ha ha ha!
Hoo-boy, are we ever fucked.
2.
Did I say Matt Gaetz may possibly be charming if he, say, made evil a interest as an alternative of a full-time gig? Severely. He’s not a terrible-looking man. I all the time thought he regarded a bit like a younger Jack Nicholson—although, granted, solely the model from the third act of “The Shining.” However nonetheless. Jack Nicholson. That’s not half unhealthy.
Gaetz joined Kristen Welker on “Meet the Press” to elucidate why he irresponsibly set hearth to probably the most precious home within the nation, and he claims there’s a plan and we’re watching it play out.
Do inform.
WELKER: “Properly, that takes me to my subsequent query, Congressman, since you led this effort to oust Speaker McCarthy and not using a clear alternative in place. Was that irresponsible in your half?”
GAETZ: “Properly, not solely do we’ve got a transparent alternative, we’ve got two. We’ve two males who’re extremely revered …”
WELKER: “However you don’t have a alternative and it’s not clear both of them have sufficient votes.”
GAETZ: “Properly, I believe that in a two-man race, it’s so much simpler to get somebody to 50% plus 1 than in a race the place you’ve gotten three, 4, 5, seven individuals. So the truth that it’s been a constrained race—you’re watching the plan play out. And by the best way, if we’ve got a Speaker Jim Jordan or a Speaker Steve Scalise on the finish of the approaching week, there received’t be a single Republican sans possibly Kevin McCarthy who doesn’t imagine we’ve got upgraded the place.”
Uh, two clear replacements isn’t a “clear alternative.” It’s a large number. And since selecting between Jim Jordan and Steve Scalise is like attempting to choose between John Wayne Gacy and an industrial wooden chipper as the primary stage leisure on your daughter’s 4th party, this might drag on for some time. Congratulations, Matt. It’s chaos you wished, and it’s chaos you bought.
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3.
Sorry to carry the room down, nevertheless it appears just like the world has one more battle to fret about. It’s deeply unhappy, terribly soul-crushing, and completely mindless. So naturally Republicans rushed to politicize it.
The newest GOP speaking level brazen lie is that the $6 billion in Iranian money President Biden agreed to unfreeze as part of a prisoner swap deal helped finance Hamas’ assault on Israel.
Secretary of State Antony Blinken joined Dana Bash on CNN’s “State of the Union” to debunk these predictable assaults.
BASH: “Whereas we’re speaking about Iran, I simply need to ask you if you wish to reply to what we’re listening to from Republicans, who’re again and again since this occurred utilizing the phrase ‘appeasement’ in relation to Iran and your administration. They criticize your choice to unfreeze $6 billion in Iranian funds. I do know and need to say that that cash, in accordance with your administration, has not but been unfrozen. Iran doesn’t but have it. However the accusation is that … the administration’s posture towards Iran has helped contribute to this. I need to offer you an opportunity to reply.”
BLINKEN: “Properly, there are two issues right here. First, with regard to the funds that you just talked about that had been made out there to Iran for humanitarian functions as a part of getting People again who had been being held and detained in Iran. Let’s be very clear about this, and it’s deeply unlucky that some are enjoying politics when so many lives have been misplaced and Israel stays underneath assault. The info are these. No U.S. taxpayer {dollars} had been concerned. These had been Iranian sources that Iran had gathered for the sale of its oil that had been caught in a financial institution in South Korea. They’ve had from day one … underneath our sanctions the appropriate to make use of these monies for humanitarian functions. They had been moved from one account to a different abroad to facilitate that use. As of now, not a single greenback has been spent from that account. And, once more, the account is carefully regulated by the U.S. Treasury Division so it might solely be used for issues like meals, drugs, medical gear. That’s what that is about. And by the best way, the earlier administration arrange a really comparable mechanism to allow Iran to make use of its oil proceeds that had been blocked from numerous locations or caught in numerous locations for humanitarian functions. So individuals are both misinformed or they’re misinforming, and both manner it is incorrect.”
Properly, you already know Republicans. In the event that they’re not lyin’, they’re not tryin’.
Although “appeasement” is a enjoyable phrase. I’ve been listening to it so much these days. Like, as an example, right here:
Say what you need about these Lincoln Venture people, and I perceive if you happen to’re skeptical of them—they are Republicans, in any case—they know the right way to make a video.
4.
How does one segue from a battle within the Center East to a skirmish inside GOP Rep. Nancy Mace’s head? One doesn’t, I suppose. One merely rolls the clip.
Mace joined Margaret Brennan on “Face the Nation”—and this occurred:
BRENNAN: “I do know you’ve been outspoken about defending victims of sexual assault. Do the previous allegations in opposition to Jim Jordan that he turned a blind eye to sexual abuse offer you any reservations? How do you clarify that?”
MACE: “Yeah, I’m not acquainted or conscious with that. He’s not indicted on something that I’m conscious of, and so I don’t know something and may’t communicate to that …”
BRENNAN: “It’s the Ohio State College allegations.”
MACE: “Yeah, I don’t know something, and I don’t know something about that. What I do know is that I’ve been a really sturdy voice for ladies. I’ve talked to Jim Jordan and Steve Scalise about that. I’ve been a really sturdy advocate for rape victims, as you talked about earlier. The Judiciary Committee with him as chairman just lately handed a rape package invoice that Barbara Lee and I are engaged on, and people are the info and the info that I’ve to work with, and I’ve had a really constructive expertise with him in that regard.”
Okay, to start with, since when does being conscious of indictments matter to Republicans? That’s new.
Additionally, what the fuck? There’s basically no likelihood Mace isn’t conscious of the allegations against Jordan. In any case, there’s not a lot to find out about him. If you already know he likes to take off his suit coat at hearings and that he can’t be fed after midnight, you already know concerning the Ohio State stuff. She’s virtually definitely mendacity.
Anyway, as of Sunday morning, Mace nonetheless totally supported Jim Jordan’s bid to be the subsequent Home speaker. One thing tells me she’ll stay steadfastly unaware of the allegations in opposition to him till at the least after the vote.
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However wait! There’s extra!
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